The fascinating thing about this adoption process are the amount of firsts our children experience in such a short period of time. I looked at our little prince yesterday and almost began bawling on the plane.
To myself I was arguing this is his first plane ride ... You don't know that ........duh, he was an orphan. And the overwhelming sadness hit me again. This child of ours who enamours all of those around us, and draws them in. Our little boy with the surprise giant dimples in his chubby cheeks. The cutest little teeth and cherub laugh.
This child who in reality started life with a pair of extra thumbs and was layed outside a hospital gate - probably in the middle of the night, just hours after being born . . . Because he wasn't perfect.
I just want to shout at the people - do you see how perfect he is, he is NOT a throw away child. Even with the hidden secret of his dwarfism, he was still perfect.
Probably a really good thing I am not fluent in the language.
Not even a week in my arms, and we are head over heels in love with this baby. And he is already attaching to us. Yesterday we went even 1 step further as he a fell asleep in my arms for the first time. This was huge.
With Cav, it was months before we could walk past the room and he wouldn't wake up. Although Cav loves us fiercely, his deep down trauma is heartbreaking. Growing up in an orphanage with no family to love on him is beyond imaginable. being just a number as a baby, no one to cuddle you when you cry, rock you when you ar sick. Our little prince (Griffen) has shown me what adoption CAN be like - the pretty picture. And my heartaches all over again for the hurt child at home I am not sure we will ever 'fix.'
Just like I know I can't fix a society who would throw away their children. I don't by any means blame the mothers - in fact I cheer their efforts to putting their own lives at great risk to ensure their baby is found. But I do blame a government and years of insane rules for making these families choose.
We are so blessed and so many things we take for granted but the very nature of where we were born affords us the opportunity to LIVE.
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We are in Guanghzhou now - going to do our medical today. I will post pics, cuz I know that's what you want to read not,y crazy ramblings from a tired momma who hasn't been able to FaceTime with her kids for a couple days lol!
Yvette, I know exactly how you feel. I look at our daughter home just 8 months and have to guard my thoughts. I feel myself getting so angry with a country that creates an environment that makes these "perfect" children orphans. What a loss for our children, for their birth families and even for the country they came from. I look forward to departing tomorrow to bring home another perfect child.
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