Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Rearview mirror

Last week jsut was a bad, bad, very bad week!  We were under such spiritual warfare, I came to my breaking point - you know the one where you ugly cry in public. . . yeah that was attractive and gave those who carefully watch us, even more conviction why not to adopt.

But we are back to our cheery selves loving life, our family and God.

Sunday started with our annual church in the park - we all love it ~ and who wouldn't listening to the wind blow through the pine trees, sitting with our family and friends praying.  It changed my bad attitude of reviewing the wrongs in my life.

Cav had surgery to remove the rods yesterday morning.  I dropped Cav off and ran back to the room to checkout while he had his 1 1/2 hr surgery.  Not even 10 min later I get a call from the hospital (which I missed . . . BAD mom!) that the surgeon needed to talk to me.  I was panicked that Cav was going to need a skin graft over his amputation site that has been infected and jsut plain nasty.  NOPE - he was done.  All that prayer healed his site and there is jsut a little bit left unhealed.  The rods came right out and we left the hospital at exactly 10 am - the same time he was supposed to get out of surgery.  This boy is a rockstar!!

And he is thrilled the only color they had for his wrap was PINK!

Although I am pretty open here I have not mentioned the issues I have had with extended family (ok except the perfection post.)  Anyhow this summer has been hard, harder than I have experienced in the past.  I have had to realize that boundaries I have let slide for years, need to be put into place.  I am typically a pushover - um but frankly when you have a little boy who has lost everything in the world, not acknowledging him on the day he loses his legs is incomprehensible.   Ok, I only tell you this because truly God's grace was magnificent yesterday.

Cav received this darling little tiger from a grandma (an AP's mom) in New Zealand.  I got it last week so I kept it for his surgery and he loved it!  So amazing to see people who have met our son once love on him.  Anyhow, in recovery (as I was checking my phone in hopes that the illusive text might appear this time) in came Cav's nurse.  I jsut laughed at God's humor when she opened her mouth.  YEP, she was from New Zealand!  Can you see the Godwink?  Maybe, jsut maybe we need to acknowledge the love from those around us instead of looking in the rearview mirror and hoping.


  1. Oh girl I am so sorry your going through that...that stinks. I know what your going through as we go through that with extended family, too.

    By the way, after a 6 week wait we got our TA! Waiting on the CA appointment now!

  2. I know how heartbreaking it is when family does not acknowledge our adopted kids. It took a long time but I realized we could choose the "family" we surround ourselves and our kids with. After all, our immediate family is made up of people related by heart and choice, not by biology. Wonder why that revelation took me so long!

  3. I came across your blog while searching SN Adoption here in Australia (which, completely OT, is near impossible). I've never commented but felt drawn to with this post. We have two Korean children through the miracle of adoption, and whilst 95% of our family were/are incredibly supportive, the remaining 5% weren't. As hurt as we originally were, we came to realize that we needed to protect our children and surround them with those who love and adore them and not let any negativity into our lives. Ultimately we made the decided to cut them out of our lives as we were so busy stressing over that negative 5% that we overlooked the love and support of the majority 95%. it was the best decision we ever made for our family. Yes, initially hard, but it's THEIR loss, not ours! We choose who to surround ourselves with and those who become family. Blood doesn't give people rights.... It's the LOVE that matters.
    Love and all good things, from across the ocean.
    BTW. Cav just melts my heart!!

  4. I hear you about family too. I have maybe one family member who is at all supportive of our choice to be a large family. We are currently bringing home our 8th child and haven't heard one kind word about it. I agree with Tamara above, we have to protect our kids from this.

    Your children are amazing, and I'm so glad Cav is doing well.


  5. Ohhh...I so get this. We are feeling that same feeling...under attack. Hugs and prayers....

  6. Oh Yvette, I am sorry for the heartache you've been experiencing. As I'm sure you've noticed, it's amazing how the bigger family of Christ, and family of adoptive parents can come together when you don't feel the support elsewhere. We're all rooting for you and adoring your kids alongside you. I am so sorry for what you haven't felt amongst those closest to you. Hugs from Oregon!
    ~Angie J.

  7. Uhhhhh yeah. Right there with you girl. Brought two kids home from China...nothing. Brought another one home 4 months later who 3 days later had open heart surgery.....nothing. What. The. Heck. Praise God for friends and strangers and blog friends and other adoptive parents who stood in the gap for us. I will never forget getting care packages nearly everyday in the hospital for him most of which were from people we had never even met and nothing from our own families. So, so sad. 10 months later and I'm still looking in my rear-view. Thanks for the reminder that I need to look forward. Gut check complete.