Friday, January 14, 2011

A file!

In just a few short days since I started this blog I went from months of searching, questioning, and searching to a file!  In my heart I already know she is my daughter. Yep, a girl.  We thought for sure we would be adoption a boy, we know boys, we have plan for little B and our new little boy to share his large room.  However, when we received her file, something occurred to me.  At Sundays sermon our wonderful new pastor spoke of challenges, and if things fit nicely into our boxes then they wouldn't be a challenge, and we wouldn't grow from them.  And so yes God opened the door and we have a little girl.

As for DH I gave him time to think about it (we have two weeks).  He processes, he worries . . .he is a man.  However, he did have to laugh when he read the file the first night.  "She sounds just like Pita (our 8 year old)!  THis little one is 'obstinant sometimes' her file says.  I just have to laugh.  Our kids have always been outgoing, and little B draws crowds wherever we go.  COuld we really have a child that was docile and quiet?  I guess God answered that.

Anyhow, I am thrilled and nervous at the same time.  The kids - well,  lets jsut say that this was a proud momma moment.  I did bring up the question to them.  I was worried how little B would feel about being a big brother - he was thrilled.  But in his typical manner asked some questions.  When he found out she had no momma or daddy it took him some time to process this, he couldn't even imagine.  Not so thrilled with the girl part but that will come.  My next worry was Pita, how would she feel about not being the only girl.  Our little mother was also actually thrilled with the thought of a little girl to dress and play with.  Big T - well he was as compassionate and sweet as always.  So then we told daddy!

The answer is not yes, but in my view of the world it is also not no.  I have prayed that if this is God's will then he will make it alright with DH.  Prayers please jsut encase anyone is out there!

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