Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Unexpected sadness

Although I thought of great pictures to take for this post . . . I finally realized it was better to just get it down.

When we were all decorating the tree last weekend, I would carefully unwrap each and hand them out.

And in that joyful moment I realized another heart stabbing reality of adoption.

My oldest has . . . Like 6 ornaments from his first year - cuz, you know we were psychotic.

The othwers had a few from their first Christmas.

And then I had 3 brown faced children - their deep brown eyes looking expectantly at me for their special ornament . . . And my heart shattered for them.

Yesterday, it dawned on me . . . EBAY!

So today on our snow day I went on eBay and ordered them each a first Christmas ornament - from their birth year.  Some day they may realize what a dork I am, but darn it, these children were born that year, and as I review the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season of 2007, 2008 and 2010.  i would have loved to hold their tiny self in my arms, searching every store for just the right ornament - to commemorate them.

I of course also ordered the forever family ornament from hallmark for this year, and have to still find something for for last year.

I am thinking my new search in the after Christmas sales will be a new ornament for each child for each year.  A friend had once told me his grandparents did this for him so when he went to college his first tree was NOT bare but filled with memories.  

It's those memories I want for my kids - but especially our 3 youngest.

I did have this one made this summer and my husband just laughed!


  1. I've been there. One child still doesn't have her ornament because the Precious Moments ones are too expensive for her birth year right now. We had to fake it. It really is heartbreaking that these children are just beginning their family life and we have history from the moment we are born.

  2. My aunt gave each of us an ornament every year and it was such a blessing! My sister and I have continued the tradition with our own kids and it's so much fun! We also get our kids a snowflake from Vermont Snowflakes (pewter castings of actual photos of snowflakes) every year. They aren't cheap, but they are as different as each year is.

    I know what you mean about being sad that there was no one to celebrate their first Christmases with them, but what a gift they have now - and are to us!

  3. I love your family ornament:)
    We have run into this too, one of the things I had done with our kids is every year we make an ornament that has their picture on it, we started this year ago with Lenna. Then I realized that 3 of my kiddos don't have these either so we are working on options for them. We have added a lot of Chinese decorations to our tree and I have tried to order enough of those that our kiddos will have them someday. We'll see.

  4. I picked up a couple ornaments in China, which I'm very glad I did. This year I have a Waiting ornament. When we travel, I'll be sure to pick up a few more, for both kids.

  5. I love that ornament! I was thinking of doing that with ebay, too, but haven't done it yet...maybe now I will. What is Fei Fei's english name?

  6. OK...I tried posting yesterday, but I don't think it went through. Maybe because I was on a Mac instead of a PC? Anyway...

    When someone mentioned Chinese ornaments, I immediately thought of some ornaments recently sold by Scarlet Threads ( They are the Chinese characters for Family, Love, Faith, Hope, Grace and Blessing and they are BEAUTIFUL!!! They were a pre-order item, but there might be some sets available for shipping in January. On Facebook I was told to e-mail to find out if there were more available. No, it's not a birth year, but it does bring in the Chinese culture. <3

    P.S. I'm not sure why your husband laughed at your family of frogs. I think they're adorable!

  7. The first year that our 6 year old was home, she had a couple of ornaments (she had been with us for only a few weeks at that point). Of course, we had older kids who had been with us since birth and they had many more things to hang on the tree. She didn't seem upset at all, until the next year when we unpacked the boxes. Like you, I found myself on ebay shortly thereafter, catching her up! Last year was the first Christmas that she got to unpack an ornament from every year of her life, and the joy radiated from her beautiful face the whole time!
    I happen to love your frog family! I also happen to have the ornaments from Scarlet Threads, and they are lovely.

  8. We have never been "into" new Christmas yearly ornaments for the kids (we have two grown and now our littlest six year old). I think I will copy your idea/tradition of new ornaments each year just for AA. I really love the idea as she needs all the traditions and memories we can give to her.
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

    Alyzabeth's Mommy for Four Years