I have to come clean folks - we have been keeping a VERY BIG secret.
I hate secrets, and not good at it.
I realized today I was keeping this secret because I was afraid.
Afraid of what others would say
think,
did I mention say?!?
Believe me when I say that it has become crucial that I ask all of those around us to pray for us.
Let me start with the story.
We have been in a bit of shock. Since January we have been riding a rollercoaster. We thought that someday we might return to China . . . but not within a year. AND most definately NOT for a baby! This has been as close as we will ever come to experiencing an "OOPS" pregnancy. Now that the shock has worn off, we are in the race of our lives.
We feel that THIS story needs to be shared.
This time around we received signs left and right. The bombardment was impossible for even the most dense of us to miss! Things like the most affordable new truck we found came with a 6th seat instead of the standard 2 bucket seats, . . . to the babies name being Tao - meaning "the way" (in a very similar way as Brahm's.)
BUT most importantly, this is a story of faith, of taking the most unexpected leap. You see the "baby" was #953 on the shared list, and had been hidden for over a year. Listed at a mere 6 months of age his "diagnosis" was scary. His symptoms were listed including a heart condition, bone condition and extra thumbs. One agency even refused to get an update because they determined that he was to severe for our family.
I sent his file to several of the dwarfism specialists and the answers frankly scared me. Either he had the form of dwarfism like our FeiFei OR a type that 50% die within the first year.
Why us, why him, why now.
But he kept weighing on our hearts so we asked another agency for an update. Week after week NOTHING! We knew he was in an orphanage that almost NEVER gives updates, but we prayed. We so felt that an update would give us direction, and help answer our ton of questions. Finally, six weeks later and with the clock ticking, we made the decision to take the biggest leap of faith of our lives. I am not talking about a gracefully little step forward, I am talking about an eyes closed, deep breath Indiana Jones leap of faith ONLY possible with God.
Not even knowing if this baby below was still alive, would ever walk, and hidden somewhere in another horrible orphanage. He was our son, and if he was going to die, he would do so with someone knowing his name and praying for him.
Meet Long ZiTao - May 13, 2010 (his birthday 1 day after Cav's)
And then we noticed his clothes. Of course the kids noticed his French Fry pants & that he is walking! We also received PA on 4/17/12 ~ which means he is pretty much our newest little darling! So many prayers answered.
Now onto the race of our lives part.
Our homestudy agency will not be renewing their license in June. We MUST have all of our paperwork to China before this time. We have a bunch of steps - most importantly, our paperwork is being sent to Homeland security this week for our new I-800A approval. (it should have been sent over a week and a half ago.)
Last year this process took 60 days.
We are oddly at peace but are asking for prayer.
We were not going to tell people, because frankly we are not in a place to handle criticism. Believe me, we have spent months coming up with every excuse why this does not make sense, how it can negatively affect our family, how old we are - and eventually realized none of that matters.
Please if you have read this far, could you add our family to your daily prayers. Pray that every person who touches his file does so with a sense of urgency and accuracy. Pray that our paperwork is completed in a timely manner and that we can meet our June 1st deadline. That baby Tao is covered in prayer until we bring him home.
I hate secrets, and not good at it.
I realized today I was keeping this secret because I was afraid.
Afraid of what others would say
think,
did I mention say?!?
Believe me when I say that it has become crucial that I ask all of those around us to pray for us.
Let me start with the story.
We have been in a bit of shock. Since January we have been riding a rollercoaster. We thought that someday we might return to China . . . but not within a year. AND most definately NOT for a baby! This has been as close as we will ever come to experiencing an "OOPS" pregnancy. Now that the shock has worn off, we are in the race of our lives.
We feel that THIS story needs to be shared.
This time around we received signs left and right. The bombardment was impossible for even the most dense of us to miss! Things like the most affordable new truck we found came with a 6th seat instead of the standard 2 bucket seats, . . . to the babies name being Tao - meaning "the way" (in a very similar way as Brahm's.)
BUT most importantly, this is a story of faith, of taking the most unexpected leap. You see the "baby" was #953 on the shared list, and had been hidden for over a year. Listed at a mere 6 months of age his "diagnosis" was scary. His symptoms were listed including a heart condition, bone condition and extra thumbs. One agency even refused to get an update because they determined that he was to severe for our family.
I sent his file to several of the dwarfism specialists and the answers frankly scared me. Either he had the form of dwarfism like our FeiFei OR a type that 50% die within the first year.
Why us, why him, why now.
But he kept weighing on our hearts so we asked another agency for an update. Week after week NOTHING! We knew he was in an orphanage that almost NEVER gives updates, but we prayed. We so felt that an update would give us direction, and help answer our ton of questions. Finally, six weeks later and with the clock ticking, we made the decision to take the biggest leap of faith of our lives. I am not talking about a gracefully little step forward, I am talking about an eyes closed, deep breath Indiana Jones leap of faith ONLY possible with God.
Not even knowing if this baby below was still alive, would ever walk, and hidden somewhere in another horrible orphanage. He was our son, and if he was going to die, he would do so with someone knowing his name and praying for him.
Meet Long ZiTao - May 13, 2010 (his birthday 1 day after Cav's)
But what I love most is that God is in the details.
We asked for an update the end of Feb. We signed our homestudy on March 24th. We took our leap committing to our son on April 3rd.
And then He showered us with HIS grace.
We received an update on April 10th - the incredible part - it was dated March 31st!
We learned that he is obviously alive AND healthy, he is in foster care, and that he most likely has the type of dwarfism as our FeiFei.
We asked for an update the end of Feb. We signed our homestudy on March 24th. We took our leap committing to our son on April 3rd.
And then He showered us with HIS grace.
We received an update on April 10th - the incredible part - it was dated March 31st!
We learned that he is obviously alive AND healthy, he is in foster care, and that he most likely has the type of dwarfism as our FeiFei.
And then we noticed his clothes. Of course the kids noticed his French Fry pants & that he is walking! We also received PA on 4/17/12 ~ which means he is pretty much our newest little darling! So many prayers answered.
Now onto the race of our lives part.
Our homestudy agency will not be renewing their license in June. We MUST have all of our paperwork to China before this time. We have a bunch of steps - most importantly, our paperwork is being sent to Homeland security this week for our new I-800A approval. (it should have been sent over a week and a half ago.)
Last year this process took 60 days.
We are oddly at peace but are asking for prayer.
We were not going to tell people, because frankly we are not in a place to handle criticism. Believe me, we have spent months coming up with every excuse why this does not make sense, how it can negatively affect our family, how old we are - and eventually realized none of that matters.
Please if you have read this far, could you add our family to your daily prayers. Pray that every person who touches his file does so with a sense of urgency and accuracy. Pray that our paperwork is completed in a timely manner and that we can meet our June 1st deadline. That baby Tao is covered in prayer until we bring him home.
